Human Dynamics
The extent of your anger, frustration and resentment towards another, is in direct proportion to the extent you’ve compromised, denied, silenced or abandoned yourself ‘for the sake’ of said person / relationship, which was never required, but chosen, for your perceived benefit (and to your actual detriment); not theirs.
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Intensity at the start is indicative of a NO.
But you get caught up.
Pretend it’s a YES.
Until the NO can’t be ignored.
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You already know.
You’re not confused.
You either honour what’s true or you don’t.
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He and I don’t talk about the energetics.
We live them.
He doesn’t read a word I write.
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In a world of people pleasing, ‘courtesy’, and playing pretend, those who are unwilling to be fake are often seen as rude.
Lacking tact.
Heartless, even.
Truth isn’t the culprit here.
It’s the belief that it needs to be repressed to ‘protect’ others from who we really are, and to ‘protect’ ourselves from their response to who that is.
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If you experience euphoria when and because something happens, you’re just as susceptible to feeling its opposite in equal measure when and because something else happens.
Because your feelings are based on what happens.
And what happens changes all the time.
Which means your emotional state changes all the time.
So what happens becomes your Master.
And you get a new Master every day.
Maybe even every hour of the day.
But the ultimate truth is:
Events are not your Master.
People are not your Master.
Feelings are not your Master.
You are your Master.
If you choose.
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Deliciousness happens when you move towards the tension.
Power.
Ecstasy.
Freedom.
Truth.
Yet most people do everything they can to avoid it.
It’s dangerous.
It’s uncomfortable.
It’s all too much.
Better to stay safe, comfortable and small than to actually leap into the unknown.
Better to complain.
Better to be bored.
Better to stick with what doesn’t work.
At least there are no surprises there.
Better to blame others,
the government,
the past,
the moon,
for all that’s going wrong.
Better to light up than to feel the tension.
Better to pour one than to feel the tension.
Better to binge than to feel the tension.
Better to overwork than to feel the tension.
Better to act powerless than to feel the tension.
Better to avoid that person, that call, that truth.
Better to lie, to hide, to cheat, to stay.
Better to just remain in the illusion that all is okay.
Anything is better than standing in one’s full power,
in the truth of each moment,
in the endless tension that brings.
Anything is better than that.
Until it isn’t.
Then you just stop caring.
All the fucks? Gone.
Making others comfortable? Done.
Caring what they think? As if.
Risking it all? No such thing.
There are no risks.
There's nothing to lose.
There's only truth.
There’s only YOU.
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The powerless surrender to illusion.
The powerful submit to truth.
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That thing...
That person...
is not more powerful than YOU.
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Too many people have tamed their beast.
An animal isn’t meant to be caged.
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It doesn’t matter who stays.
It doesn’t matter who goes.
But when you make something or someone matter,
when you turn it or them into a requirement for your well-being - for your anything,
you create a chain from you to that which you’ve made matter so much.
But as you already know,
attachment isn’t love.
Requirement isn’t love.
Need isn’t love.
In fact,
the stronger the attachment to,
requirement from,
or need for
anything or anyone,
the less that love is present.
Pure love just IS.
With or without it,
with or without them,
all there is,
is love.
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My work has nothing to do with trust.
There is no ‘building’ it, ‘maintaining’ it, or ‘breaking’ it.
It’s all (and only) about the energy.
When it’s pure, we play.
When it’s not, we don’t.
It’s not, and will never be, about trust.
That’s what people who deny their power need to believe is necessary for them to step fully into truth.
But you don’t need to trust another.
You need to trust yourself.
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She is a Dominatrix in all areas of her life.
With all the people in her life.
With one exception.
To the energy within,
she freely submits.
The world; she owns.
By IT; she’s owned.
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“And my closest friends experience it, too!”
I’m not surprised. Of course they do.
You’ve found your people.
Your Trauma Tribe.
Always helping each other to keep it alive.
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Fuck the idea that you have to do something to ‘add value’ to the world.
There is nothing more ‘valuable’ than being who you are.
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It’s not that you don’t trust men.
It’s that you don’t trust yourself.
You knew something was off.
You ignored that knowing.
And you stayed when you should have left.
That’s on you.
Not men.
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You want me to join you in the “real” world.
Yet you won’t join me in the REAL world.
And the difference between you and I,
is that I don’t care if you join me here or not.
You, on the other hand, are hell-bent on recruiting.
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