The NO

His Moves Are Not My Business (An Essay)

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Months ago while telling a friend about a moment with the fella that I was a HELL NAW to, she asked if I help a guy to shift the things that I’m not into, or if I just end things because of it.

My response:

I only do what the moment requires of me.

Whatever that may be.

Me making my true move does exactly what needs to be done.

Across the board.

With everyone.

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

I dropped deal breakers / boundaries / standards long ago.

They aren’t necessary.

And no, I don’t ‘help’ the fella shift his shit because that, too, is unnecessary.

He’s grown.

And his moves are not my business.

He can be however he wants to be.

I’ll make my moves accordingly.

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

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The Refusal To Stay Where It's False (An Essay)

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my NO with him only adds to the turn on

without that being my incentive to honour it

all i know in a moment is not this

what he does with that is not my business

not my ‘problem’

not a consideration at all

and yet

what he’s done with each zig and zag of me

has been heavenly

so dreamy

and

as i continue to ride each edge

making the entrance point more narrow

more pristine for the god in me

what awaits me on the other side of that perpetual sharpening

is the more that can’t be tasted

the more that can’t be felt

were i to choose to just deny myself

and abandon what is true

and it’s that whittling down to nothing

that refusal to stay where it’s false

that devotion to truth in each moment

(no matter what happens as a result)

that creates a vortex for the ALL

the ALL that can’t be named

the ALL beyond my wildest dreams

the ALL that’s sourced from NO

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You're Asking The Wrong Question (An Essay)

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It's not: "How do I get the clients / make the money / overcome the addiction / heal the pain / resolve this health and / or relationship 'issue'?"

It's: "When will I stop saying YES to a NO? When will I stop supressing what's true? When will I make being the living truth my full-time job regardless of who or what is in front of me?"

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The NO vs The Edge (An Essay)

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When there is a big, fat NO in my system that I didn’t catch right away, I feel sick in my throat.

It feels like dread.

It feels heavy and icky in my gut.

Things feel serious, tight, restricted.

And that dense feeling eclipses everything else until I figure out where the NO must be applied and how.

It doesn’t matter that I missed / ignored it the first time or how long I kept missing / ignoring my NO.

It doesn’t even matter who or what or why.

There’s a NO in my brilliant system and to keep saying YES to it would be a lie.

That sick feeling is proof that I missed / ignored it and kept missing / ignoring it or else it couldn’t have gotten to the point of full blown dread.

Who cares.

New moment.

New move.

Let’s rock.

When there is an edge in my system, I also feel sick.

Nauseous.

Hella nervous.

Like I’m at the top of a rollercoaster about to go down.

But there is no heaviness.

No dread.

No lump in my throat at all.

Nothing feels icky.

It feels exhilarating.

Fascinating.

Fun and light and limitless.

Yummy and also terrifying.

It’s not knowing what the fuck is gonna happen but being so willing to take this wild ride just because it’s true, and to let my fear stop me would be a lie.

And so…

A true NO is telling me to stop.

A true edge is telling me to go.

(Peep this Mandy Bite)

That’s how I tell the difference.

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The NO And WHOA Are Equal (An Essay)

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Every NO and WHOA is made equal.

Both are sourced from the absolute truth.

Both are hot in the system of anyone in contact with them.

Both are exactly what’s required in that moment (as is a yes/no).

Both add to your knowing (as does a yes/no).

Both source even more art (as does a yes/no).

So you’re always on track with your NO and your WHOA,

birthed right from the death of your yes and your no.

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Stop Blaming A Lack of Money (An Essay)

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Lack of money isn’t the reason you aren’t living your fullest and truest life.

You are the reason you aren’t living your fullest and truest life.

And lack of money is a by-product of that self-denial.

And…

It’s not about the money.

You can have nothing in your account and still make your truest move right now.

But you use lack of money as your excuse not to do that.

It’s an easy ‘out’ from riding the edge of life and of yourself.

The perfect excuse to keep saying NO to you.

And how freaking handy to blame your self-created, restricted inner experience on that clearly-more-powerful-than-you money.

That completely-outside-of-you money.

But here’s what’s true:

That ‘restriction’ you experience financially is simply the energetic restriction you’re living in constantly, projected onto, and out-pictured through, money.

Your system is jammed.

And so are your finances.

Because money doesn’t move before you do.

It’s already there.

Where are you?

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