Human Dynamics

Smudge On The Eyes (An Essay)

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when there is smudge on the eyes

a distorted lens that discolours everything

one cannot see themselves

situations

or others

as they truly are

and…

in order to cope with that misperception of self

of the illusory other

of what is actually going on

(and the discomfort that arises from a truth one cannot own)

one projects what’s false

and deflects what’s true

effectively ‘protecting’ the illusion

while convinced that it’s truth

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The Illusion Of A Purpose (An Essay)

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In a call the other day, the fellow was talking about not having a purpose aka a made-up concept to attach himself to.

You know, to give himself / his life some direction, some meaning, some much needed motivation.

Something he can create an identity around.

Something to make him feel more ‘like a man’.

Because being exactly who he is and following his natural movements on the daily isn’t enough.

There needs to be an add-on.

Something quantifiable.

Something more / other than this.

I told him I don’t have a purpose.

He said it’s different for men.

I found that amusing.

Mostly because he just put us both in a separate category based solely on physicality (ignoring the energy aka the truth which would completely disprove his point if we really were talking about the masculine and feminine) to explain why I’m fine not having a purpose and he’s not.

It’s not because I’m a woman.

It’s because I’m not attached to bullshit.

Regardless of gender, regardless of conditioning based on gender, an illusion is still an illusion.

Purpose (or lack of), like self-worth (or lack of), like value (or lack of), like countless other things that aren’t actually real, is just a human-made concept to attach to and create a story around.

Something to hold on to, to point to as the reason you feel the way you do, or do the things you do you think you should do.

Something to avoid being the living truth.

Which comes with no labels.

No terms.

No concepts.

No thing.

Your ‘purpose’ is to BE yourself,

unobstructed,

if there had to be a thing.

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You're Asking The Wrong Question (An Essay)

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It's not: "How do I get the clients / make the money / overcome the addiction / heal the pain / resolve this health and / or relationship 'issue'?"

It's: "When will I stop saying YES to a NO? When will I stop supressing what's true? When will I make being the living truth my full-time job regardless of who or what is in front of me?"

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Seeing Through The Public Persona (An Essay)

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You can swap the coach, the paradigm, the partner.

You can change the business, the lingo, and make big money.

You can lose the weight and hit a new personal record.

And STILL not shift energetically.

Just because you switched the box and the externals look different, it doesn’t mean a damn thing changed.

And just because others paint a superficial and strategically crafted picture of themselves publicly, doesn’t mean it’s the real thing, either.

These days, when I read certain posts from those I once looked up to, and they are still selling the same flat experience (but now in a sparkly ‘new’ package), those I thought had ‘made it’ and knew something I didn’t (since I didn’t yet trust myself fully) because I was reading their content (which is what sold me) instead of their energy (which speaks the actual truth)…

I can now feel where they’re really at, regardless of what they’re saying.

And in all this time, nothing got cleaned up.

They never actually moved.

They simply added new words, new offers, and new price points from that same exact place.

Pretending something new has taken place, and maybe it has circumstantially, but energetically it’s stagnant as hell and wasn’t truly alive to begin with.

But back then I was sold on the external narrative.

My ravenous desire to find answers to my perceived dilemmas, and relief from what ailed me, clouded my ability to discern between what was being presented in the physical and what was actually loud as fuck in the non-physical.

But the cleaner I got, the easier it was for me to read between those lines.

To feel the truth beyond the words.

To know where someone’s actually at instead of where they’ve positioned themselves to be.

So I came to understand that some of the most celebrated and followed ‘teachers’ are the ones drowning in the most illusion.

They’re energetic hot messes.

Which captivates and motivates those who are also drenched in matter.

They love the resonance.

The feeling of ‘same’.

I love the void.

The feeling of clean.

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Don't Touch Their Shit (An Essay)

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People don’t shit on my posts.

But I often see people shitting on other people’s posts.

And people responding to said shit.

Engaging with said shit.

Thereby creating even more shit.

But here’s the thing:

You don’t have to touch another person’s shit.

Ever.

You can actually just let the person sit in their shit.

You can refuse to partake in their self-created shit show.

And when their thrown-about shit has nowhere to stick,

it lands exactly where it belongs.

With the shit disturber themself.

Who is now being confronted with their shit that wouldn’t stick.

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You Don't Need Closure (An Essay)

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When you let a situation ‘bleed out’ (come to its natural and inevitable conclusion), you choose not to touch it because it doesn’t require an intervention.

It’s not avoidance.

It’s knowing through discernment.

It’s staying where it’s true.

Not remaining where it’s flat.

And…

It’s not true that you need ‘closure’.

To wrap things up.

To contrive an end point,

just so you can say it’s done.

It’s done the moment it flatlines.

Anything beyond that is just more of that.

So no need to state the obvious.

Or bring it back to life.

Just stay where it’s most alive,

as everything dead falls away.

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Three Trillion Layers Deep (An Essay)

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if someone has travelled three layers deep

and you have travelled three trillion on route to a bazillion

you’re swimming in a vastness they’ve yet to taste

but can sense

in you

and in themselves

this will terrify and / or intrigue them

or feel so far from where they are that they insist it doesn’t exist

(because they don’t yet have the eyes to see what’s invisible to the eye)

they’d rather stick to what is seen and known

(like most do)

and so…

at three layers deep

with three trillion more layers beneath

and a bazillion more layers to go

they’re content with those three layers

believing that what they see is all there is

so for them, nothing feels like it’s missing

even though much has yet to be explored

they simply aren’t yet pulled to touch

the underworld of themselves

and who can blame them, really?

those depths aren’t for the masses

they’re for those

who can’t survive

let alone thrive

unless / until they freefall

into the darkness

into the abyss

into the stillness

where nothing exists

and when one comes across another

three trillion layers deep

there’s a mutual

and oh so beautiful

recognition of what it took

to arrive at those depths

where most won’t dare to swim

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Your Only Viable Option (An Essay)

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Energetically speaking, there’s no difference between having money and not having money.

Having the relationship and not having the relationship.

Being in lockdown or hitting all your favourite spots.

You’re here to make art out of every piece.

Only you think and believe that one is better than the other but YOU know that all things are made equal.

In that ALL moments,

regardless of what they do or don’t contain,

are already perfect and yours to play with as you wish.

And each one comes with a delicious edge that you can ride if you like,

or not.

And if you choose not to ride your edge because you’re ‘waiting’ for the money,

the relationship,

the external permission slip to show up before YOU do,

you’re gonna have a rough, repetitive and helluva boring time.

You think you want the (fill in the blank) but YOU are here to dissolve everything in the way of it, including your desire for it.

And riding the edge of this moment is your only viable option for that to happen.

You can’t skip your moments and the work to get to the ‘good’ parts (truth) you haven’t earned by fucking with the shit parts (illusion).

There’s just no way around it or YOU.

You either make it your full-time and life-time job to fuck up everything in the way of you and YOU…

or you coast and dream,

like the others do.

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You See Right Through It (An Essay)

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if you look at yourself

your life

others

and the world

through the lens of the energetics

you see what’s really going on

how accurate it is

and how inevitable things are

based on the energy at play

which is why you’re unaffected by what you observe

and why you’re not distracted by the noise and how things seem

and why you’re not surprised by the delusions people maintain

because you know it can’t be another way

and everything that IS

is perfect

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You Don't Have Issues (An Essay)

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You don’t have a money issue.

A health issue.

A relationship issue.

Any issue at all.

You have whatever is brought to the surface through whatever meaning you’ve projected onto whatever is happening or not happening with your account, your health, your relationships, your whatever the fuck.

Not an issue.

An invitation.

It’s not about having or not having a certain amount of money.

It’s not about having or not having a certain measure of health.

It’s not about having or not having the relationship(s) of your supposed dreams.

It’s about facing and transmuting every bit of constriction / density / matter / illusion that shows up as you navigate every single facet of life - including your finances, your health, your relationships and all the rest.

It’s not about the category.

It’s about the congestion.

And the area in which you feel the most congested / restricted / powerless, is where you think there’s an issue (naturally), but ultimately it’s just the spot that’s the ripest to fuck with (look at, challenge, and ultimately see through).

It’s your own self-generated playground to unclog, free up, and own your damn power already.

So let go of the concept of there being an issue.

There’s no such thing.

There’s just energy moving freely or temporarily getting jammed up.

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The Other Is Not My Business (An Essay)

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There was a period of time when I found it invigorating, even fascinating, to read the ideas, and witness the evolutions, of others on social media.

Eventually, that ceased to be the case.

Not because the others had changed.

But I had.

I fell even deeper into myself and the rest just felt like noise.

So I stopped observing said noise and got quieter within.

More still, more sure, more pure, more me.

The other is not my business.

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